I tweeted earlier today about a couple things I’ve been thinking about recently: Harry Houdini and Back to the Future II. It gave me an idea for a grand fanfic, or a series of fanfics, about deleted scenes involving the things that Old Biff could do with Young Biff to get the younger Biff’s self-esteem back up after the failed rape of Marty’s mom. I mean, the guy must have felt his worst after he couldn’t force himself on the love of his life, and then George McFly goes and punches him, you know?
I like to think that Old Biff took Young Biff on a series of time-traveling adventures. The first stop: visit Harry Houdini, so Biff can sucker punch him to death and get that old self-esteem a-rising again. But that obviously wouldn’t be enough, so where to next?
Maybe they can visit London, where Biff can release his frustration by brutally murdering every woman who even slightly reminds him of Lorraine.
Or they can go play around in ancient Rome.
Maybe even visit Colonial America and stir up some trouble there.
Ultimately, though, one of their incidents turns out to be a grand misadventure in which Young Biff dies. Old Biff survives, but before the paradox claims his life, he tries to set time straight and makes one more change: instead of going on a series of ego-boosting adventures with his younger self to make him feel better, he gives Young Biff a sports almanac. He makes the change just before the paradox claims his life, and the rest of BTTF2 happens. (He still dies anyway because, well, he still changes the future and can’t continue to exist anymore.)
That would’ve made for an epic deleted scene.
